


The Scar On Your Spine

by Spark_Stark



Series: To Bring You Back Home [9]
Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Autistic Spencer Reid, Boss/Employee Relationship, Coming Out, Domestic Boyfriends, Injury Recovery, M/M, Protective Aaron Hotchner, Sleepy Cuddles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-28
Updated: 2020-08-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:01:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 9,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25576987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spark_Stark/pseuds/Spark_Stark
Summary: Aaron helps Spencer with his recovery after the explosion in the prison.
Relationships: Aaron Hotchner/Spencer Reid
Series: To Bring You Back Home [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1820395
Comments: 55
Kudos: 332





	1. Chapter 1

The team was gathered anxiously around Emily’s bed as she recalled all the details leading up to the moment before the explosion. Her eyes were glossy and her words were slightly slurred but everybody pretended not to notice for her sake. She hated being babied, even if she had just been blown up. 

Rossi and Morgan had caught the first available commercial flight after Hotch had phoned them to say that Reid was in surgery. He had collapsed into the visitor’s chair beside Prentiss’ bed as soon as he hung up. 

Everything had been a blur since. 

Jack and Matt had stopped by to check in and give him his go bag that had been left in the back of the car rented from the airport. They didn’t try to talk him into going back to the hotel to get some sleep, they knew he wouldn’t leave the hospital until both his team members were safe and healthy.

Eventually, Prentiss was becoming tired from the questioning and the worry. They all left to let her get some sleep in peace and wandered to the hospital cafe in search of coffee. 

It had been almost ten hours since Spencer was admitted to surgery. The surgeons informed Hotch three hours ago that he was now resting in the I.C.U. and would allow one visitor at a time once he woke up. 

Rossi forced a cup of water into his hands, refusing to give him more coffee. He hoped Aaron would crash soon and get at least an hour of sleep, the man had been on his feet since the yesterday morning. Combined with his extremely high stress levels, it was unhealthy for him to fight off fatigue with caffeine for any longer. 

Spencer woke up an hour later and demanded that the nurse bring Aaron in before he take any of the medication being handed to him. The older bemused nurse nodded and made her way out of his room and down the hall towards the group of agents in various states of unease. 

“Excuse me,” she said as she approached the team, a light smile on her face when she glanced down at her clipboard. “Dr. Reid has woken up and refused to take his medication until he speaks to ‘that idiot boyfriend of mine that definitely hasn’t slept in three days’.” She quoted humorously. 

She looked up through the strands of graying hair that fell on front of her eyes as she looked back up from her papers. Rossi sighed from relief and closed his eyes, blessing himself and whispering his thanks to God above. JJ put her hand over her mouth as she laughed, loud and happy. 

JJ pushed Hotch towards the nurse gently. “You’re up.” She announced and smiled at Hotch when he glanced at her over his shoulder. 

He didn’t notice the look of pure shock on Morgan’s face as he followed the cheerful nurse to Spencer’s room. 

She pushed through the glass double doors as they entered the I.C.U. and updated him on Spencer’s condition. “The doctor says he should be moved downstairs in the next few hours once we observe his initial response to the medication. It’s hard to predict how Dr. Reid’s body will react to local anaesthetic which is why the doctor recommends waiting it out. Just to be on the safe side.” Her voice was the type of calm and professional that came from years of experience. It relaxed Hotch to know that Spencer was in good hands. 

“Any signs of head trauma?” Hotch asked nervously despite feeling himself relax from the woman’s soothing tone. 

“We did x-rays on the leg and ribs but we’re still waiting on the results.” She motioned down a corridor to their left. “The E.M.T. was pretty certain about a concussion but we couldn’t do a CT scan until Dr. Reid was conscious. We’re just waiting for him to take his medication and then we’re going to send him for scans.” 

The bright corridor was lined with rooms on either side. Most of them had their curtains drawn over the windows, the only sounds he could hear were the rhythmic beeps from passing heart monitors. “He’s one sweet guy.” She commented. “Only been for awake twenty minutes but he talked the whole time.”

“Yeah, he does that a lot.” Hotch smiled down at her as they walked along side each other. “He loves to talk.”

At last they reached Spencer’s room. Hotch could barely contain his eagerness as he latched onto the door handle. Spencer tried to sit up in the bed as he entered the room but the nurse was quick to chastise him. “I brought your man in here for you so you would take your medication. You lie back down now.” Her voice was kind and maternal, her English was so clear and fluent that Hotch almost forgot that they weren’t in an American hospital. 

Spencer pouted as he turned to Hotch standing beside her at the foot of the bed. “Aaron, please tell her I’m fine.” 

“Why would I do that?” 

Aaron could barely contain the smile on his face as Spencer furrowed his eyebrows. “Are you just going to stand there or are you going to kiss me and tell me you’re glad I’m still alive?” Spencer asked, still pouting. His voice was weak and wavering but he was too tired to mask it.

His feet betrayed him as he walked to Spencer’s side, he paused before he could lean down to press his lips against Spencer’s. “Are you just going to pout or are you going to take your medication?” Aaron retaliated and crossed his arms over his chest. 

Spencer rolled his eyes and instantly regretted it as he felt waves of sharp pain behind his eyes. (Although he would never admit it to Aaron.) He stuck his arm out and let the nurse step up and place two tablets in his hand. He swallowed them dry and smirked at the predictable grimace that crossed Aaron’s face. He didn’t understand how Spencer could swallow tablets without water every time. 

He opened his mouth and stuck out his tongue in a show of theatrics. Aaron smiled and pushed the hair out of his eyes as he leaned in to kiss Spencer delicately on his lips, cupping his jaw with only the ghost of a touch. “I’m glad you’re alive.” Aaron said as he pulled away.


	2. Chapter 2

Spencer lay on the bed with his hospital gown open over his chest, he was babbling about medical advances being made with debridement. The nurse was smiling down at him fondly as she worked on redressing his leg and stomach. “You can change into your own clothes now.” The nurse said as she finished treating the burnt and reddened skin on the side of Spencer’s stomach. “When the swelling goes down from the gel, I will come back and wrap your ribs.” She explained.

Spencer thanked her as she made her way out of the room to welcome Hotch back in when she was done. “I can go back to the hotel and get a change of clothes for you.” Aaron suggested, pointing over his shoulder with his thumb. 

Spencer pressed his lips into a thin line. “I don’t want you to leave.” He admitted shyly. There was a glint of fear in his eyes that had Aaron reaching out for Spencer’s hand. 

“My bag is in Emily’s room. You can wear something from mine.” 

He squeezed Aaron’s hand. “I’d like that.” But he stopped Aaron before he could make to leave. “Aaron, I’m in the I.C.U., a nurse can get it for me.” He explained, a smirk on his face as he held up the call button beside his bed. 

Aaron cocked his eyebrow at the man. “Should you be taking advantage of that?” He asked, already knowing what Spencer was going to say in response. 

“I’m going to be moved in the next few hours. So, yes.” Spencer followed through with his words by pressing the button dramatically. When the gray haired nurse came shuffling back in to the room, she was happy to obey is request to have somebody fetch Aaron’s bag. 

He helped Spencer dress when the nurse came back with his bag and a message from Emily to say hello to Spencer, then she left them alone in the room.

“That’s going to leave a nice set of scars.” He trailed his fingers down Spencer’s side, it was red and uneven but lucky hadn’t blistered. The area was treated with ointment and numbing gel, Spencer could only feel a tingling sensation on his skin. 

Spencer looked down at Aaron’s hand that was wandering under his shirt. “I’ll look totally badass.” He joked, his voice still slightly weak and croaky from having been on a ventilator during and shortly after the surgery. He knew Aaron would feel more at ease with the light humour. He couldn’t feel Aaron’s fingers grazing around the edges of the thermal burns. 

Aaron hadn’t let go of Spencer when he could help it, seeing the image of his boyfriend lying unconscious in the ambulance blurring with the one of him being wheeled off for CT scans. 

He had reacted well to the anaesthetic and was being moved out to a smaller ward once his ribs were bandaged by the nurse. It was difficult for Spencer to breathe properly with the throbbing pain from deep in his chest, the x-rays determined that one of his middle ribs had a greenstick fracture. 

If Spencer wasn’t in a room with a renowned profiler that knew him on such an intimate level, he would have gotten away with the uncharacteristically quiet behaviour he was exhibiting. “I know you’re tired,” Aaron started quietly, running his hand up and down Spencer’s side. “But what are you not telling me?” He asked delicately.

Spencer looked up at him and smiled. “Derek.” He said faintly. 

He didn’t need to explain anything more, Aaron understood. Morgan had definitely heard the nurse call Aaron Spencer’s boyfriend in the waiting room. It would have been almost impossible for him not to. “He’s in the waiting room with Dave and JJ. Do you think they will…“ Aaron stopped himself mid-sentence, not exactly sure what he was trying to say. 

“Hopefully they can calm him down.” Spencer said, aiming for humour but falling flat. He had said the word mostly to ease his own mind. 

“Hey.” Aaron said gently, gaining Spencer’s full attention. He ran his fingers through Spencer’s hair and smiled as Spencer hummed in contentment. “If anybody can calm him down, it’s JJ. We’re in good hands.” 

There was a pause before Spencer spoke up again. “It’s not how I wanted to tell him.” He said. 

Aaron’s reply was barely above a whisper. “I know.” He wanted to say more but he wasn’t sure what else there was to be said. 

It was only then that Spencer noticed how tired Aaron was. His hair fell flat against his forehead and his shoulders had lost their usual tense, commanding posture. His body was on the verge of falling in on itself with the fatigue and Spencer felt so guilty for not noticing it earlier. “You’re tired.” He said sympathetically. 

Aaron didn’t look up from where his hand was grasped in Spencer’s. “I’m okay.”

“No, you need to sleep.” Spencer declared, feeling just as tired as him. 

“I will.”

“When?” Spencer’s question went unanswered, not because Aaron didn’t want to reply, but because he didn’t know the answer. 

They had disconnected Spencer’s heart monitor hours ago, there was a shrill silence about the room now that neither men knew how to fill. Spencer had grown up with sounds all around him, his mother loved to read aloud and he loved to listen. If she didn’t have the energy for reading then she would play records. Mozart and Handel were his mother’s favourites, but when she let Spencer pick he strayed toward Beethoven or Wagner. 

Spencer often got sensory overloads from an overabundance of noises, but sometimes the absence of it made him feel on edge too. But now both men were just too emotionally drained to talk. “I don’t sleep as well when you’re not beside me.” Spencer confessed. 

Aaron looked up. “Neither do I.” 

“When I’m moved out of here, will you sleep beside me?” Spencer asked quietly but Aaron was hesitant. ”Please?” 

The older man tried to hide his smile. “Don’t do that. You know I can’t say no when you say please.” 

Spencer ran his hand up Aaron’s arm and watched the smile slip onto his face. “Maybe that was the point.” He beamed when Aaron rolled his eyes and gave in to the smile, knowing that that was a confirmation to Spencer’s question. The two men were equally relieved to know that the other would be getting some well needed rest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey folks, i probably won't get the chance to update over the weekend :( this might be the last update until monday...


	3. Chapter 3

It was sort of claustrophobic for Spencer to be going from a quiet room in a silent corridor with only one other person to a smaller room in a louder ward with way more nurses and visitors. 

Of course, he was happy to see his friends again after almost dying. He couldn’t hug JJ like he normally would to ease her nerves, she had to settle for biting her nails nervously. Morgan had affectionately fussed up his hair and said it was good to see his pretty face again. 

Rossi and JJ were happy to go back to the hotel once they had seen that Spencer were okay with their own eyes. The agents were all tired and needed a good night’s rest, seeing Reid smiling had them calmed enough to catch a few hours of sleep. Morgan wanted to have a quick chat with Spencer and Hotch before he left for the night.

He pulled up a second chair and sat down at the foot of Spencer’s bed. Aaron was holding Spencer’s hand, he started to rub his thumb over Spencer’s knuckles subconsciously and took a deep breathe when Morgan looked between the two of them. “Something you want to share?” He asked in a tone that left no place for any answer other than ‘yes.’ 

Spencer held up his hand when Aaron opened his mouth. “I’ve got this, Aaron.” He murmured. Morgan gritted his teeth but waited patiently as Spencer collected his thoughts. 

“Aaron and I have been in a committed relationship for two months.” Spencer tried to sound as sure as himself as he could. Morgan needed to hear the facts. “We are in a good place and we have started to tell some of our close friends.”

Morgan bit his tongue to make sure he didn’t say anything too irrational or unreasonable. “Who else have you told?” He questioned. 

He felt Aaron squeeze his hand, signalling to let him answer it and give Spencer time to prepare for any other questions Morgan had. “I told Haley after Spencer agreed to meet Jack. Jack and he get on great and Haley is comfortable with it. I also informed Dave and Spencer told JJ.” His voice was calm and steady as he continued to run the pad of his thumb over the back of Spencer’s hand. 

“And I, um.” Spencer spoke hesitantly. “I told Emily on the jet.” 

Morgan wasn’t exactly sure what to feel about that. He was the last to know, minus Garcia. (Garcia, he guessed, was left to last because of her inability to keep a secret.) Why was he the last to be told? “You didn’t want to tell me?” His voice was on the verge of sadness and Spencer hated that he was the reason he sounded like that. 

“Of course I wanted to tell you. I just- I didn’t know how.” Spencer admitted. Aaron moved from rubbing Spencer’s hand to his forearm. 

That made a lot of sense, when Derek took a virtual step back in his mind. Spencer and he had a close bond, basically siblings. The first day Spencer had come into work with a hickey just barely poking out above his shirt collar, wide smile and happy to recount the tale of his night; Derek’s mind was filled with mixed images. 

Yes, he was extremely happy that Spencer had found somebody that made him smile in a way that only babbling about statistics could. Looking at Hotch sitting beside the young genius, he was a completely different man. His usual stoicism replaced with a tender look in his tired eyes as he looked at his boyfriend and a grip firm but gentle on Spencer’s arm. 

It was hard to connect the man across from him to his unit chief. If he weren’t in a professional, two tone suit, he wouldn’t have thought they were the same person. He didn’t know what to make of it or what his opinion was. Ever since the nurse had mentioned it in conversation almost a day before, it had been one of the only things on his mind. 

“I’ve never seen you both as happy as you are now.” He said, he was honest and calm which surprised both Spencer and Aaron. 

The couple shared a smile and shyly admitted that Morgan was right. “I thought I knew what love was when I was with Haley.” Aaron’s soft admission had both Spencer and Derek looking at him curiously. ”I never realised how wrong I was until Spencer kissed me for the first time.” Aaron looked right into Spencer’s eyes. Spencer was at a loss of words staring into the depth of emotion that lay there. 

Suddenly the room felt very small. Morgan felt like he was intruding on a deep personal moment between the two men. He had a lot of questions that he wanted answers to, but it had been a long day. He was tired, Hotch was exhausted. He knew his boss hadn’t slept since he left with Garrett’s team almost two days ago. 

“It’s getting late.” Morgan said announced awkwardly as he stood up. 

He backed up towards the door of the room as Spencer said goodbye to him. Hotch gave him a curt nod that promised their conversation would be continued some other time. As soon as the door shut behind Derek, the two men’s sigh of relief were simultaneous. 

Spencer put his hand over Aaron’s. “Come on, we need to sleep.” He tried to pull on his arm but could only do so much with his injuries. Aaron was hesitant but gave in easily when Spencer opened his arms and pouted. 

Aaron almost groaned when his head hit the edge of Spencer’s pillow, gaining an instant sense of relief and didn’t struggle against the fatigue that overtook his body. He let Spencer curl into him and buried his head in Spencer’s hair. 

The last thing Aaron heard before he drifted off was the soft murmur from Spencer against his chest. “I love you.”


	4. Chapter 4

The agents were back the next morning with Prentiss in tow. Aaron had tried to climb off the bed but Spencer’s whispered ‘please’ had won him over. Dave had joked about him being entirely whipped, there was a truth to it though. It applied in reverse too, it was what made them fall on equal footing. 

Aaron hadn’t had that with Haley. Every decision, no matter how small, was made by her. It was Aaron who had to bend over backwards to make things possible with Haley. Whereas Spencer and he were balanced, a decision was only made if both of them were comfortable. 

So when the team came into the room to see Spencer curled into Aaron’s chest talking about the research he was doing for his philosophy degree, while Aaron ran his fingers through Spencer’s hair and smiled as he listened and asked questions prompting him to talk more, the agents didn’t need any more convincing to see that they were prefect for each other. 

They were so engrossed in each other that they didn’t notice their friends standing just outside the room watching them. “Surely Durkheim would have had different theories if he was raised Catholic.”

“Isn’t that the point?” Spencer looked up from where his eyes were closed against Aaron’s chest to look up into his eyes. They both paused when their eyes met, staring at the other with small smiles on their face. 

Spencer lifted his chin and glanced down at Aaron’s lips, tightening his grip on Aaron’s shirt. The older agent understood and leaned down to Spencer as he couldn’t lean up with his injuries. The kiss was warm and familiar, like they had done it a million times before. With one hand on the back of Spencer’s neck and the other tangled gently in his hair, Aaron opened his mouth to deepen the kiss. Spencer’s hands rubbed up and down Aaron’s chest and gave in to the tongue pushing up against his. 

Emily’s eyebrows raised at the unusual sight of their boss completely relaxed and openly affectionate. (Although he didn’t know that his team members were watching from outside the room.) She murmured lowly to the group, “Was that conversation meant to be flirting?” 

JJ’s shoulders shook as she tried to stifle her laughter. Rossi smiled and crossed his arms over his chest before he spoke. “I’m glad to see somebody who can keep up with the kid.” He commented. Morgan was sullenly silent as he watched. 

“Should we go in?” 

JJ’s voice held humour that had everybody but Derek chuckling gently. Prentiss placed her hand on the door handle and they watched as Hotch jolted back from Spencer. They stepped into the agent’s room, Spencer pouted and grabbed at Aaron’s arm that was fleeting from his neck. Aaron glanced nervously up at the team members making their way into the room. Their expressions were kind and soft minus Morgan’s carefully neutral face, he placed his arm hesitantly over Spencer’s shoulders. His rigid form melted against his partner as Spencer hugged the side of his frame. 

Rossi smiled widely at the two men. “Looking good today, kid.” 

“Thanks.” Spencer’s voice was slightly hoarse and it had Aaron fighting a smirk from his lips. JJ leaned over and grasped Spencer’s hand in his, she smiled at her friend and felt the stress roll off her shoulders when he squeezed her hand. 

The group fell into conversation, Rossi updating Hotch on the I.R.T.’s investigation. Everything seemed to be under control and they would be finished in the next few days. The team would be flying back to Quantico tomorrow morning, Hotch and Reid could fly back with agent Garrett’s team once Reid was released from the hospital. 

Morgan spoke for the first time as he answered his ringing phone. It was Garcia on the other end of the line, demanding to speak to the Boy Genius. Morgan handed the phone over to Spencer. “Hey.” He said unsurely. 

“My baby, how are you feeling?” Garcia asked. 

Aaron could hear the conversation clearly, but Spencer didn’t seem to mind. He kept himself quiet and still against Spencer’s side as the young doctor talked Garcia down from her worry. “I’m being taken care of.” He assured her. 

Emily and JJ made eye contact and smirked, a silent conversation occurring between the two women. Derek watched as Aaron idly traced patterns into Spencer’s shoulder, the action soothing Spencer through the phone call with the worked up woman on the end of the line. 

As much as he wanted to object to the two men’s relationship, the sight before him made that quite difficult. They were comfortable in each other’s space and despite the initial flinch from Hotch when the team walked in, they were openly affectionate with one another. It was something that neither man was previously known for and the profiler in Derek told him that it was the result of complete trust between the two of them. 

There really was no good reason for Derek to object to the relationship. At first he had worried that Hotch had an emotional and physical advantage over Spencer, but clearly they were equally involved and neither held an advantage over the other. 

It was an occupational hazard that Morgan viewed everybody as a potential unsub to those he loved. Hotch posed no threat to Reid, nor did Reid pose a threat to Hotch. What more was there say? 

He was brought out of his thoughts by Spencer and Aaron laughing at whatever was said to them by Garcia. “I’ll get back to you on that,” Spencer replied. 

Garcia whined on the other end of the line. “When do I get to meet him?” 

Spencer looked up at Aaron at the same time that the unit chief looked down at him. Aaron’s lips were thin pressed but there was the faint shadow of a smile at play. “When I get home.” Spencer promised which prompted a fuller smile from the older man. 

“Are you serious?” 

The four other agents could hear the high pitched squeal from the tech analyst on the phone. Spencer blushed and bit his lip as he answered. “Yes.” 

Garcia gasped in shock and clapped her hands. “Oh, my Junior G-Man. I cannot wait to meet the man responsible for that happy little glow of yours!” She spoke quickly and excitedly. Before the younger agent could reply, there was a beeping on the other end of the line and she bid him a rushed farewell as he hung up. 

Spencer pulled the phone away from his ear, confused but still smiling as he handed the device back to Morgan. “Happy little glow?” He questioned under his breath. 

Aaron chuckled beside him and squeezed his shoulder. “Don’t worry about it, baby.” He murmured.


	5. Chapter 5

Three days later saw Spencer and Aaron flying back to Quantico with the I.R.T. 

Spencer’s care team was reluctant about letting him fly but Aaron had promised to keep an eye on him. He had made good on his promise and stayed by Spencer’s side since they left the hospital in Paris. 

They had squabbled over Spencer returning to work which ended with Aaron putting his foot down and ordering at least another four days of rest before he came back. He hadn’t brought up the strict no-fly order yet, that was a battle for another day. 

When they were heading for the elevator to the office, Spencer brought up the conversation that was looming over their heads, both men were waiting for a quiet moment alone. “Can I introduce you to my friend Penelope?” Spencer asked humorously. 

Aaron pushed the button to the sixth floor on the wall and smiled shyly at him. “I would love that,” He answered quietly as the elevator doors slid open. 

They stepped in and let the doors close behind them. The space was filled with a silence that was expressive and laden with anticipation. Spencer slapped the back of his hands together with excitement, Aaron delicately brushed his fingers down the back of Spencer’s arm and revelled in the soft hum that the touch elicited from Spencer. 

“Excited?” Aaron asked. 

Spencer nodded and smiled at his boyfriend. “Very,” He answered and watched as Aaron’s smile widened to match his own. The doors opened to the hallway of the B.A.U. offices and Aaron let his hand fall, albeit reluctantly, from Spencer’s arm to his side. 

They wordlessly made their way side by side to Garcia’s office, their steps were slow but excited. It was Hotch who knocked on her door, Spencer watching for subtle signs of hesitance but luckily coming up empty. 

Garcia opened the door and beckoned the two men in. “To what do I owe the pleasure of my dear bossman and fellow genius?” 

Spencer stepped in first and looked over his shoulder at Aaron as he closed the door behind them. “I, uh.” Spencer responded. He blindly reached out and took Aaron’s hand in his. “I wanted to introduce you to my boyfriend.” 

Garcia’s mouth opened and closed twice before she was able to form a reply. “Are you serious? Oh, my God. You are serious.” Neither man had predicted the bear-like gripped hug that they were powerfully pulled in to. 

They stood still as she clung to them, not really being able move much in the restricted embrace they were engrossed in. Eventually, the excited woman pulled back and stared at the two of them. She cupped Spencer’s face in her hands and kissed him on the forehead. “I am so happy for you,” She gushed, turning to Aaron and doing the same. 

Aaron furrowed his eyebrows at her but let himself smile anyways. He moved his hand from Spencer’s to the small of his back, bringing Spencer closed to him. “Thank you,” Was all Aaron said in response, not being sure what else there was to say. 

Of course they had expected Penelope to have the most… vocal reaction out of all of their friends. It still left him slightly speechless at her affectionate display of support. Spencer looked up at Aaron as he felt him grazing his thumb over the material of his shirt. 

Penelope positively screeched at the open display of affection between the two of them. Spencer winced at the sound and she quieted down immediately with a hasty apology. 

“It’s getting late,” Aaron said pointedly as he looked at Garcia. “We should probably get going. You need the sleep.” This time he was directing his speech at Spencer.

Spencer pouted but didn’t object much, he was tired. Garcia gave them both an individual hug and whispered vague threats in each of their ears. They both received a similar ‘if you hurt him I will make your life miserable,’ mutter.

They walked happily out of the building after stopping by Spencer’s desk to pick up some of the case files on his desk. (Aaron knew he couldn’t keep Spencer at home for four days sans complaints unless he had work to do. It was a negotiation he had to make.)

-

Aaron helped Spencer up the stairs to his apartment, his arm around Spencer’s waist although it really wasn’t necessary according to the genius. 

Spencer unlocked his apartment door and stepped in, Aaron pulled Spencer’s go bag that he was carrying off his shoulder and placed it inside the door by Spencer’s shoes. “I’ll call you in the morning before I go to work.” He informed Spencer as he leaned over to kiss him on the cheek. 

He stepped back and put his hand on the door knob, but before he could say his goodbyes Spencer turned and raised his eyebrows. “Where do you think you’re going?” He asked incredulously. 

Aaron pointed out to the hallway of the apartment building with his thumb. “Home?” He answered, although it came out more as a question. 

“Oh,” was all Spencer said before he stepped back and turned away from Aaron.

He didn’t see the confused expression on Aaron’s face. “Spencer?” He asked unsteadily, going over the short conversation in his head to try and pinpoint what had caused the uncharacteristic response from his boyfriend. 

But he didn’t turn around as he replied with a non-committed hum. Aaron stepped into the apartment and closed the door behind him, he strode across the short space between them and put himself in Spencer’s line of sight. “What’s wrong?” He asked softly. 

Spencer shrugged, “Nothing.”

“Spencer,” Aaron said, more firmly but still soft and open. “Don’t do that to me. We promised to talk to each other.” He didn’t try to hide the emotion that slipped through the cracks as he spoke. 

It was silent for a long minute, Spencer rubbed his fingers along his thighs in a self-stimulating gesture that made it clear to Aaron that he was clearly upset. He didn’t try to comfort Spencer, knowing that he needed to let him stim by himself until he calmed enough to speak. He stepped closer so that Spencer could inhale the scent of his aftershave.

The affects were instant, seeing Spencer calm on front of him. “I just thought that you would stay,” He admitted, sounded defeated. 

“I thought you would want me to leave.”

Spencer looked up at Aaron for the first time since they had entered the apartment. “Why would I want that?” 

Aaron stuttered as he answered. “I just- I thought you would want to be alone. I know you like to decompress after being around people for too long.” 

It was starting to make sense to Spencer now. He had been upset that he thought Aaron wanted to leave, he assumed he would stay the night. Aaron had a change of clothes in Spencer’s bedroom and they hadn’t had a change to be alone together in almost a week. 

Spencer spoke softly and emotionally. “I had assumed you were going to stay the night. I’m sorry.” He finished in a whisper. 

“I do want to.” Aaron clarified, stepping into Spencer’s space and putting his arms over Spencer’s shoulders. The younger man instinctively brought his hands to Aaron’s hips. 

They leaned into each other and Spencer connected their lips together. The kiss was long and rich, speaking the apologies that their voices didn’t. Aaron pulled away gently and ran his fingers though Spencer’s hair. “I’m sorry I did not explain what I wanted.” Aaron said sincerely. 

Spencer smiled up at him. “I’m sorry I did not either.” He leaned in and kissed the side of Aaron’s lips, then moved down to trail open mouth kisses down his neck. 

Aaron tightened his grip on the ends of Spencer’s hair as he felt Spencer nip at the exposed skin of his neck and loosen his tie. “All is forgiven.” Aaron’s voice was becoming deep and hoarse. The two men started to undress each other wordlessly while Spencer walked them towards the bedroom.


	6. Chapter 6

Aaron’s hand was gently grazing the edges of Spencer’s healing scars along the side of his scorched stomach, below his fractured rib and bruised chest. It wasn’t exactly painful but it was discomforting to Spencer when he put strain on the area which Aaron was making sure he avoided at all costs. Spencer said he was most comfortable on his back, so he lay as still as he could looking up to the ceiling of his bedroom while Aaron laid on his side stroking the reddened skin. 

“What age were you when you finished high school?” 

Aaron’s hand stilled for a short second. “Sixteen,” He answered. 

Spencer hummed and turned his head towards Aaron, a wavy strand of brown hair falling onto his forehead. “Why prosecution?” 

The hair was brushed behind his ear by Aaron and replaced it with a soft kiss. “It was the only field that would hire a nineteen year old.” Spencer chuckled and fought the tinge in his side as he did so. Aaron felt him tense beneath his hand and tried to sooth his partner with a gentle press of lips against his neck. 

“I’m okay, Aaron.” Spencer had been insisting so all night from the minute they left Quantico. The blissful silence of the apartment filled the gaps in their conversation. Aaron trailed his mouth across Spencer’s naked chest and neck until Spencer relaxed under his touch. 

Spencer ran his hands through Aaron’s short, soft strands of hair as he hummed in contentment. He pulled him up to push their lips together in a lewd and sensual kiss, Aaron’s unshaven scruff rubbed against Spencer’s skin making him smile against Aaron’s mouth. He enjoyed the scratchy touches on the sensitive areas of his face and neck. 

The older man was pulled to lay back down against Spencer’s side. “Can you keep the beard for a few more days?” Spencer asked as he stroked his index finger down Aaron’s cheek. 

Aaron grinned as he covered Spencer’s hand on his face with his own. “I’ll think about it.” Spencer pouted childishly in response. 

Neither man was able to fall asleep despite their overwhelming tiredness, it was a shortcoming that came with their line of work. Plagued by thoughts when awake and nightmares when asleep meant that it was difficult to leave the job at the door when they came home. 

It was one of the things that Haley had always had a problem about. Aaron, no matter how hard he tried, couldn’t disassociate himself from the B.A.U. in his previous relationship and he was just the latest on an ever-growing list of husbands and wives that the job served as a catalyst to their divorce. 

Would things be different with Spencer? Could the job still put a wedge between them if they worked the same one? 

Jessica had asked him once after the separation, well over a year now, a question that Aaron still wasn’t sure he knew the answer to. Did he love coming home from work in the evenings as much as he loved going in the mornings? After Jack; absolutely. Some days it was hard to let go of the young boy’s hand and replace it with his briefcase and Glock 17. But before Jack?

“What are you thinking about?” 

Aaron shifted his gaze from the wall across from him to the man beside him, admiring Spencer’s handsome features that shone against the lights from the city outside his window. “When I was married,” He began, watching for any signs of… anything on Spencer’s face, but the younger agent remained soft and loving as he listened to Aaron’s words. “I used to enjoy going to work more than I did returning home.”

Spencer didn’t speak up because he wasn’t sure if Aaron wanted a response, instead he waited and soon Aaron spoke again. “I thought that was the reason why we failed, why our marriage ended. But I don’t think it was.” Aaron was talking slowly and unsurely, saying the words as soon as they formed in his mind. 

“What do you think the reason was?” Spencer asked delicately. 

His hands fell against Aaron’s bare chest as he absorbed the heat that radiated from the other man. He could tell that Aaron was at a loss for words, not knowing how to answer the question. But the thoughts were troubling him and Spencer wanted to be the sounding board that Aaron had always needed but never had. 

When he spoke, his voice was deep with emotion and slightly hesitant. “I settled for less,” Spencer knew he wasn’t finished explaining so he stayed quiet and rubbed his palms up and down Aaron’s chest encouragingly. “When I met Haley, all my focus was on trying to prove that I could be a good son to my parents. I put all my attention on graduating quicker and getting into law school.” 

Spencer nodded, non-verbally communicating to Aaron that he was listening. “The week I got back from boarding school, my friend came to visit. One thing led to another and uh, my father walked in. He lost his temper and I just didn’t want to go back to boarding school. I told him it was a misunderstanding and I had a girlfriend.”

“You didn’t, did you?” 

Aaron laughed. “Of course not. I was a socially awkward coin collector with a southern accent,” He answered with a chuckle before sobering up slightly and continuing. “Two weeks later I met Haley and that was that.” He ended his story with a non-committal shrug. 

There was a brief silence before the men made eye contact and a cloud of understanding formed around them. “You didn’t just lie to your father.” Spencer said, his voice barely above a whisper. 

Aaron sighed and nodded. “I love Haley as much as a gay man can love a woman,” He admitted. “But I tried to convince myself I was straight from that day onwards.” 

Spencer pushed himself closer to Aaron, placing a gentle kiss on Aaron’s shoulder and then resting his head against the spot. “I’m sorry that happened to you. It must have been difficult.” Spencer looked into his boyfriend’s eyes as he spoke sincerely. 

“But now,” Aaron started as he leaned in closer to Spencer’s lips but not yet touching them with his own. “Now I am exactly where I want to be.” 

He closed his eyes and pressed his lips against Spencer’s delicately. “So am I,” Spencer confessed, kissing Aaron chastely. “I love you.” 

Aaron smiled wide and unabashed as he replied. “I love you too.”

They wouldn’t sleep much that night, but being with each other was enough. They could rest and rise the following morning with the same broad smiled on their faces.


	7. Chapter 7

Aaron had to bribe Spencer to stay in bed the next morning when he rose, promises and compromises falling flat against the young genius as he pouted in protest. Eventually the reached an agreement. 

“I’ll stop by on my lunch break and help you out of bed to your office,” Aaron’s suggestion perked Spencer’s interest and he hummed to show he was listening. “You can work on the files we brought home until I come over in the evening.” 

Spencer bit his lip and at last he nodded. He pulled Aaron closer to the edge of the bed and looked up at him shyly. “Can you bring pizza?” He asked bashfully. Aaron chuckled and ran his hand through Spencer’s mussed up hair. 

He leaned down and placed a soft kiss against a fading bruise on Spencer’s forehead. “I can’t say no to you when you look at me like that.” 

Spencer blinked up at Aaron, trying to hide the smirk forming on his lips. “Like what?” He asked, faking an innocence that had Aaron rolling his eyes. 

The two men stared lovingly at each other for a long moment before Aaron stepped away with sigh, reluctantly admitting that he had to get going. He cupped Spencer’s face in his hands and kissed him long and lazily. Spencer couldn’t lean up without aggravating his stiches or ribs. 

“Please call me if you need anything.” 

-

“Spencer, when I said call if you need anything,” Aaron said in an amused tone as he held his mobile phone to his ear. “I meant something important like medication.” There was a ghost of smile on his lips as he continued his paperwork. 

He heard Spencer shuffle on the other end of the line. “I’m lonely and I wanted to hear your voice. I would classify that as of the highest importance.” 

Aaron’s smile widened as he placed his pen down on his desk and leaned back against his chair. “I’ll be over in a few hours.” He said. 

“Take an early lunch.” Spencer pleaded. 

“It’s ten a.m.”

“You don’t eat enough anyways,” Spencer argued from his bed. “If it weren’t for the cereal bars I put in your jacket pocket, you would starve to death on cases.”

Aaron’s mouth opened in shock as he registered what Spencer had said. “That’s where they keep coming from?” He asked surprised. 

Spencer laughed loudly down the phone. “What, did you think they just magically appeared?” He asked with a hint of sarcasm that had Aaron raising his eyebrows. 

“I thought I just put them in there and forgot,” The older agent admitted without embarrassment in his voice. 

Both men had realised that the conversation had strayed from where it began, but Spencer wasn’t too serious in his insistencies. After three days of being beside Aaron day and night, he really was just missing him. Their easy ability to converse when they were together was what had originally drawn them to each other all those years ago, feelings that they weren’t yet ready to come to terms with.

It was strange and refreshing to openly communicate, not needing to rely on discretely profiling their partner to deduce what they were feeling. Spencer was lonely and missing his boyfriend, so he called him and told him so. 

Aaron couldn’t focus on his work because his mind kept drifting to his boyfriend, so he answered the call and told him so. 

“Spencer,” Aaron sighed into the phone as a short silence filled the virtual air between them. “I have work that needs to be done.” The reluctance was as clear as day when he spoke. 

He looked out his office window and watched his colleagues not-so-subtly watching him from the bullpen below. “They’re watching you, aren’t they?” Spencer asked. 

Aaron looked away, down to the abandoned case file on his desk. “Yeah.” He whispered, not yet ready to pick up the pen and return to working. 

“They just haven’t seen you smile before.” Spencer teased. 

The unit chief fought to keep the smile from his lips as he asked, “How do you know I’m smiling?” 

Spencer’s mattress creaked as he tried to roll on to his less injured side. “You smile with more than just your mouth.” He answered, as if that explained everything. To Spencer, Aaron figured, it probably did. One of the things that fascinated him about Spencer was how his mind could complete puzzles without all the pieces. 

It took several failed attempts, but Aaron did manage to say goodbye and resumed his focus on the paperwork littering his desk. He needed another cup of coffee to counteract the lack of sleep he had gotten the night before. 

The team was uncharacteristically silent as he made his way down to the break room, passing by the agents as they desperately tried not to comment on the tinted pink shade across his cheeks or the unbeaten smile on his lips. 

He filled his cup and stood in the centre of the bullpen. “Come on guys,” He announced, drawing the team member’s attention to him. (They were pretending not to be staring.) “You’re all bursting to say something.” 

Prentiss’ response was instant. “Uh, sir. I think you’ve got a little something on your mouth.” She motioned to his smiling face as a grin grew on her own. 

Morgan snorted and beckoned JJ over as she walking out of her own office. She took one look at the group before she smirked and turned to the unit chief. “Hotch, are you feeling okay? You’re not scowling.” 

Aaron let the three of them poke fun at him for a few minutes, enjoying the light hearted atmosphere that filled the usually depressive space. He chuckled lightly along to their friendly jabs, knowing they meant no harm or disrespect to him or Spencer. 

Eventually their focus shifted from him to Spencer, asking about his injuries and how he was handling the recovery. “He’s annoyed I forced him to take a week off.” Aaron said, causing the other agents to chuckle in response. 

Morgan rolled his eyes as he uncrossed his arms. “Back to his usual then.” 

"When does he start with the physio?" Prentiss asked. 

"Next week," Aaron replied, "He's not looking forward to it."

The admission surprised none of them, knowing that Spencer was too independent to rely on others for his own recovery. Aaron mentioned his worry about it to Spencer the night before, delicate to compare it to his stubbornness of allowing Aaron to help him get clean after Georgia. The raw emotions in Aaron's eyes that portrayed his worry and fear had Spencer melting beside him, promising he would try his hardest to commit to his recovery.

They didn't break their promises to each other.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi! I wrote a semi-detailed description of a sensory overload and other pieces of info about Autism in this chapter. All this applies to me and my experience as an autistic. (projecting onto characters?? who's she??) So, yeah that's that. This means that what I wrote mightn't be relatable to other autistics reading this. 
> 
> that's all I really wanted to say. Enjoy reading! I'm thinking about the next part of this series atm.

Spencer’s reflection stared back at him in the mirror above his bathroom sink. The uneven red skin covering Spencer’s side made him cringe, he ran his fingers over the blue and black bruising of his ribs and tried to rub the cream over the raw wounds. His motion was limited and caused him to wince when he moved too far too quickly. 

There was a knock on the bathroom door followed by Aaron’s voice, “Spencer, can I come in?” He asked. Spencer hummed in approval and looked up at the man entering through the mirror. “Do you need some help?” 

Spencer nodded and dropped his hands down to his sides as Aaron walked up behind him. Aaron placed a delicate kiss on the side of Spencer’s neck and slid his hands under and around Spencer’s unbuttoned shirt, rubbing in the rest of the cream where Spencer couldn’t reach due to his injuries. 

Noting his boyfriend’s unusual quiet behaviour, he drew soothing patterns in his skin the way he knew Spencer liked. “What are you thinking?” Aaron asked softly, just above a whisper. 

The younger agent bit his lip in apprehension as he looked down at his stomach. “I look-“

“Don’t finish that sentence,” Aaron interrupted, his voice firmer but still just as soft and loving. He brushed his hands up Spencer’s chest and pulled him back against his own body, burying his nose in his boyfriend’s hair. 

They were silent as they stood together on front of the mirror, Spencer placed his hands over Aarons that were resting on his exposed stomach. Today was Spencer’s first day back at the B.A.U. since the explosion, it was way too early in Aaron’s opinion but Spencer had the final say once his physiotherapist had cleared him for light duty. He would work on any case that came up over the next month from Quantico as a compromise. 

Aaron had come by to give Spencer a lift to work, refusing to let him take the subway until he was completely recovered. The two men had argued over when ‘completely recovered’ was, Spencer insisting he would be fine in two weeks maximum and Aaron knowing it would be at least another month. 

Spencer still refused to admit that it hurt when he breathed. 

“I don’t like how I look,” Spencer reworded the phrase so that it came out less self-deprecating for Aaron’s sake. 

Aaron trailed kisses along any exposed skin he could reach as he begun to button Spencer’s shirt. “That’s okay,” He replied, (Even if he didn’t think it was. Spencer didn’t need a dispute at the moment, he needed reassurance. And that’s what Aaron was going to give him for the rest of his life if needs be.) “I like it enough to make up for it.” 

Spencer retorted with sarcasm to cover the fact that there were tears forming on the edges of his eyes. “If the team heard you right now, they wouldn’t be as afraid of you as they are.” Once his shirt was buttoned fully, he turned in Aaron’s arms to face him and lean back against the edge of the sink. 

“They’re not afraid of me,” Aaron retaliated. 

The younger man grinned, it was shy and hesitant, but it was a good sign. “I was.”

“Until when?”

“Until you let me blow you in the-“

“Okay, I get the point.” Aaron laughed. “Please do not mention my unprofessional behaviour again.”

Spencer rolled his eyes and circled his arms over Aaron’s shoulders despite the protesting pain of his ribs. “Nothing unprofessional about helping out a colleague in need,” Spencer teased. The depressive atmosphere of the room had been lifted and replaced with a more comfortable one that both men could enjoy and relax in. 

Aaron fought to keep his face and voice neutral as he responded. “You’re right, I would let any of my team members suck my dick if they needed to.” 

As expected, Spencer’s face contorted into a grimace and he swatted at Aaron’s shoulder. “Don’t put that image in my head.” He scolded without much heat behind the words. Aaron responded with what could only be described as a giggle. 

-

It was to be expected that Spencer would suffer with the sudden change in scenery when he came back to the office. The week confined to his apartment brought the solace of soundproofed walls and relative solitude for many hours of the day. A stark contrast to Quantico, people bustling by and phones ringing. Spencer’s desk sat in the epicentre of the noise. 

Although it had taken some adjusting, he had eventually gotten used to the commotion of the bullpen. But after his week of absence it was as if he had never known the noises at all. 

Aaron had been keeping a close eye on Spencer from a distance throughout the morning. He had, luckily, caught the first signs of a sensory overload early. Signs that not even Spencer was aware he exhibited, rocking in his chair and running his hands down his shirt in search for a comforting touch, something blissful to counteract the sensory hell all around him. 

He stood from his desk and quickly but quietly made his way down to Spencer’s desk. He approached him cautiously, announcing his presence and not touching him until Spencer made it clear that he was okay with it. 

Spencer had never explicitly told him about how to handle a shutdown, but he had been given pointers and information for further research by Jack’s doctor a few years ago. Shortly after Jack turned two, Haley and he had become concerned about Jack’s communication skills and behaviour around others. The doctor suggested that he might have mild Asperger’s but the couple decided not to have him formally diagnosed. That was a decision Jack would be allowed make himself when he was older if he so wished to. 

Similarly, Spencer had chosen not to be formally diagnosed. His mother had never trusted doctors and once Spencer had met Gideon, he told him that a diagnosis on paper might have an impact, whether intentional or not, on his future in the Bureau. 

Aaron, Haley, Jack and Spencer were all comfortable with self-diagnosis and that was all that mattered. 

He scanned the room looking for sensory triggers; the TV by the break room, Prentiss typing on her computer, the heavy rain against the windows. “Spencer,” He called out, just above a whisper as to not attract too much attention to the agent. “It’s Aaron.”

Spencer didn’t respond verbally, his shoulder’s eased slightly as Aaron came closer. The smell of his aftershave, Aaron deduced. It was familiar and not overwhelming, Spencer had always liked the scent. “Tap the desk if you think you can stand up.” Aaron instructed, knowing from research that it was wise to avoid questioning Spencer, instead offering him a convenient way to communicate. 

He tapped the desk twice with his index finger. “Let’s go to my office,” Aaron suggested. Spencer tapped the desk again and stood up weakly. Aaron stood close, still not touching, as he led Spencer to his office. 

The blinds were drawn over the windows and the glass pane that overlooked the bullpen. Aaron shut the door and offered for Spencer to sit down on the small couch by the wall. “I have my nice sweater in my go bag under my desk.”

Spencer tapped his leg. Hastily, Aaron grabbed the clothing from his bag and made his way over to Spencer, kneeling down on front of his boyfriend and holding it out to him. 

It was fifteen minutes after Aaron handed him the sweater before Spencer’s senses seemed to relax to a manageable level. He reached out to the older agent and weakly placed his hand against Aaron’s arm, signalling that it was okay for Aaron to touch him. He responded by bringing his hand up and around the back of Spencer’s neck to the skin exposed between the end of Spencer’s hair and the beginning of his shirt collar. 

Spencer hummed pleased at the feeling and leaned in closer to Aaron. His voice was small and shaky but he thanked Aaron and smiled.

“You can work in here for the rest of the day,” Aaron said. “I’ll get your files from your desk. Make yourself comfortable.”

When Aaron came back to the office, Spencer was sitting cross-legged on the carpeted floor. His back was against the couch and Aaron’s sweater was draped across his lap. Aaron handed him his case files and the few pieces of stationary that littered Spencer’s clustered desk. “Thank you.” Spencer said, more coherent and stronger than last time.

Aaron smiled widely, letting his shoulders ease as he watched Spencer before him, comfortable and back to his normal self. “No problem, love.” He replied, making his way back to his own desk a few feet away.


End file.
